Well, wear (ha ha) to begin – probably with Adam and Eve in the biblical sense, but in Darwin’s sense then with the climate I would imagine.
The earliest quote on clothing (I can find) is from Epictetus (a philosopher) year 55
“Know, first, who you are, then adorn yourself accordingly”
so discovering our body shape and then buying our clothes is and always has been how to do it.
Clothes are a major part of our life 7 days a week and for some of us 24 hours a day as well if you wear pyjamas/nightie so it’s no wonder we spend a lot of money and time trying (and I emphasis trying) to get it right.
We have so much to take into account – what’s available, the climate (and for England, as we well know, that means 3 outfits in one day quite often) and the suitability of attire to allow us to do what we need, and also allows us to ‘fit in’ with what everyone else is wearing. Our family upbringing and home life, our religion and even what sports we play all contribute to our style of clothing and on top of all that we have a personality that we want to show through our clothes.
Are You Wearing A Uniform?
Because of the many dimensions of dress – we, as the human race are inclined to go for a uniform to form our identity and to make us a part of a group (uni – unify, form – formation) – I know I’ve been there! Think of the obvious: school, football team, nurse, police. Then the not quite so obvious: the suit (both for males and females), fashion –punk, mod etc etc.
When we dress for that night out we are looking to blend in with the crowd and some of us want to look better than the crowd and be noticed.
Fancy Dress Style
Not too many years ago I went to what I thought was a fancy dress party dressed as a pink lady from Grease – how uncomfortable did I feel getting strange looks all evening – if I had been dressed ‘ way out’ such as a lion it would have been obvious and funny, but because pink ladies weren’t outlandish I just got strange looks all evening because I was out of kilter from the rest of the group.
I’m sure you have worried about what everyone else is going to be wearing to ‘a do’ and then spent all night comparing yourself to the others there!
Judgmental Dressing
A lot of this anxiety about what we’re wearing comes from the subconscious knowledge that we are being judged like we judge others.
Let me tell you a short story – A few weeks ago I went to a networking meeting that had a speaker on creativity, I had arrived late and so didn’t get to the introductions – when the gentleman stood up to do his talk, I switched off – he was dressed in a light grey pinstripe suit, with a pale multi-pin striped shirt, no tie, and brown loafers. Added to this was his hair being in need of a trim, greying at the ends and slightly wavy. He was about 5’6” in height. None of these things were bad,on their own, but the overall look was insipid!
He used to be business/corporate man and was now something else but hadn’t left the suit behind.
As I said he failed to press the right buttons with me because his look didn’t match with his subject. Now I like to believe that I’m a none judgmental person, but he had to work harder because I didn’t believe in him from that first moment. I have to say after 5 – 10 mins of speaking he had me totally enthralled and I learned loads, but ………. We all do it! – even if you get over it slightly quicker than I did!
This happens in our day to day lives – some of us have our ‘uniform’ for various times down to a fine art. For example, just being good at dressing smartly in a suit for work, allows us to hide behind that suit very well and everyone knows the person in the suit – but the panic that can ensue from an invitation saying smart/casual can be significant and I have to say for myself that is also the worst sort of invite to get as it’s so hard to define!!
We’ve all gone to some party or function feeling either over dressed or under-dressed.
I hope you’re beginning to get the idea that it’s not that easy or straight forward to always wear the right clothes for the right occasion.
Dress For Your Body
But what if we turn it all on its head and say we can go out of the house always knowing that we look good ?
Well everyone can – no matter what their body is like. You just need to dress for your body and that means taking your body on as it is – warts and all!
You may have parts of your body that you don’t like. In this day and age, with the impact of the press, Models and Celebrities we have become even more judgmental of ourselves than we ever are of anyone else.
Part of feeling good in your clothes is accepting your body, and dressing to make the most of all your good parts, the bits that are in balance, we all have something, and balancing out the not such good bits, we all have these as well.
This can send your self confidence soaring and then when you go out – it’s not all about how do I look compared to others – it becomes all about you feeling confident in yourself and your choices.
Sally Inkster
Image Consultant
